Pigs in Crisis

You know the story of the three little pigs. The third pig saved the day, right? The third pig was the smartest, right? Well, yes and no.

It turns out that the third pig reached beyond his means to build the brick house. Along with it came a hefty mortgage and home equity loan that created a debt greater than the value of the house. In good times this was not a big issue, but troubles began when the recession hit.

Workforce cutbacks in hours for the third pig put a tremendous strain on his finances. In time he was laid off. Searching high and low he was unable to find steady employment at all, much less of the same caliber as his previous position.

In short time he could not make his mortgage payments. The bank foreclosed on his wonderful brick house and he was forced to move out.

Simply put, a well-educated, well-employed pig does not earn enough to afford a brick house. Whereas the old mortgage rules made it possible for pigs to reach above their means, the housing crisis and new mortgage rules have made it virtually impossible for pigs to obtain a brick house loan. They are only qualified for buying houses of straw or sticks.

And that is the crux of the crisis.

Pigs with brick houses provide shelter from big bad wolves. Even if not living in brick houses themselves, pigs always knew someone who did and could seek shelter if the wolf came knocking.

Now, that is no longer the case. Pigs cannot qualify to buy brick houses and those who owned them have been getting foreclosed upon and evicted in record numbers. Wolves are having a field day and the pigs are essentially defenseless.

Some pigs choose to live on hog farms where they get free room, board, and protection. However, those pigs pay the ultimate price. It is well known that pigs are not diligent in reading the fine print on contracts, so they always focus on the free benefits section and overlook the part describing their ultimate fate.

So if you think the recent mortgage reforms are completely sensible, consider the poor defenseless pigs out there in the world.

Next installment...

Pigs tap the black market for guns: Why background checks unfairly disqualify pigs from legitimate weapons purchases